SKINNER'S MUSE

"I don't think so." Said Grady:"This woman with
you. End of story." God I hated it when he talked
black.
I began to sweat (well it was hot) and I hoped my
deodorant would hold out. Bad enough dying but I
did not want my epitaph to read:Brave little bugger-
but she stinks.
If I was dead it would be stank I guess.
Shit.
I smiled at Skinner:"I hate you." I said sweetly:"And
you are a lousy shag!"
Neck tittered briefly, Skinner glowered.
"You wait." He said:"Wait and see what I'll do to you,
you will be begging for a shag!"
"I was begging for a shag when I was with you! That
will tell you how little I was getting!"
"You bitch!" He fumed.
I looked at Angela.
"What are we going to do?" She said.
"I don't know yet, but don't worry, something always
turns up, it always bloody does!"
"Maybe your luck has run out." Said Grady.
Maybe it it had........
They walked us through the crowd, people dancing,
kissing, getting drunk and pulling nipple rings. A
happy lot.
We must have made a grim spectacle, Angela being
restrained by her arms by both Neck and Grady
and me, well Skinner had his arm tightly around
me, we must have looked like and ideal couple.
They pushed us through the bar and behind to the
notorious Club Exit where all your fantasies can
come Pru.
Shit.
I could hear Angela praying, not I hasten to
add to any Christian God, no she was mumbling
something Jewish sounding, so I guessed she
was into Kabbalah now. Then so was Aleister
Crowley. Pray faster, I urged in my head.
Skinner suddenly shut the door to the hidden
club and dragged me off down the hall into a storage
cupboard.
"This is where you will learn to be my woman."
He said in his lispy, affected voice.
"Shove it up your arse!" I said.
He punched me very hard in the stomach doubling
me over.
"Why fight destiny? You are my Muse, my queen,
but you act like a gutter-mouthed slut! I love
you more then any woman, more then Jeff and he
was sublime, but you throw it in my face! You
must learn humility and I will be your Master."
He began to roughly pull my clothes off, I still
could not fight, my arms felt like lead.
I was soon naked and sticking to the filthy floor,
I could feel little sharp bits scratching my soft skin
and I could swear that Angela was screaming in
the background.
Something about figures.
Didn't make sense.
Skinner flexed his belt and thrashed my legs
twice before I could yelp, then brutally across
my face. Yep, my fucking nose again!
I curled into a ball of pain, was this it then?
This stupidness brought about because of my
big mouth?
"Turn over, this is going to be nice." Cooed Skinner.
Mutely I obeyed, inside my head over and again
think think think!
But nothing, no epithany, no bolt of lightening,
I couldn't rely on lateral thinking.
No this had to be freestyle.
I smiled at Skinner:"Come and have a go if you
think your hard enough dickweed!"

Becka M

RUN BECKA RUN!

While everyone stared at me posing like a prat,
Angela was getting the upper hand of Neck-indeed
she was straddling him!
Could not help notice Neck had a big ole grin on his
face and an even bigger erection.
"Get you!" I said and kicked Skinner in his tight trousers!
No reaction.
No change there then.
"You are going to learn discipline if I have to pull your
pants down and fingerfuck you here in front of
everyone." He hissed like a viper.
Put like that......
"Run!" I said and grabbed my lovely Angela and we
flew in the way only a tall gangly girl and a tall
over-weight girl can fly.
Slowly.
Even Grady caught up with us.
"You foolish bitch." He admonished.
"You fat bastard." I said.
"I am an important woman! I can sue!" Warned
Angela.
"Angie." I whispered:"They don't care hon, really
they don't."
"Oh dear." She said.
Skinner lashed out with his belt, in another life when
I was queen pervy of the perveramas this would have
excited me no end.
But I was not in the mood to be made into a display
piece.
"Hey guys." I looked at Angela, she was trembling and her
soft flesh made delicate little rippling motions."Let the
big girl go ok? I'm the one you are pissed with......"
So noble and so young!

Becka M

KUNG FU FIGHTING


'Those guys were fast as lightning and it was a little
bit frightening.' (Which was understatement of the
year!)
Right, Angela looks a bit shaken up, I guess her imagination
was working overtime. Us dainty ladies and those big
bruisers.
I grinned at Grady again and like my mouth was on a
compulsion to get me killed I said:"What you going to do
about it?"
Grady's eyes looked like they were going to implode
or something.
"You are a crazy bitch!" He yelps in an amazingly squeaky
voice.
"Tell me about it bebe!" I said like Austin Powers.
"Becka please!" Said Angela and gripped my wrist tightly.
I took the small plastic penis from her and threw it in
Skinner's face.
"That's a spare for you love!" I quipped, his eyes behind
their contact shields were hidden. But a bead of sweat
dripped onto his lip. If you forget the dick part he was
one sexy motherfucker for a baldie.
But I couldn't.
Forget the dick part that is.
Neck laughed, Grady and Skinner both eyeballed him.
"Sorry." He said quietly, I winked at him.
"For a criminal Neck you are a pretty cool guy, why
do you hang with such dead beats?"
Neck made a movement towards me and Angela
took this to be an attack, next minute she is wrestling
him down to the floor.
Oh dear.
This was signal for me to go beserk.
I lifted the small table and tipped it over,
covering Skinner and Grady in cream and
strawberries (nows there's a thought!)
"You fucking bitch!" Shouted Grady and threw
a punch, but being that his arms were on
the short side, he missed me.
"Oh I'm so scared!" I said in a sarky voice, I
really was though!
"You are going to die!" Bellowed Grady:"Yow!"
He shouted, Angela was biting his ankle.
Shit!
Skinner looks at me and takes off his belt
slowly.
"I'm going to give you the beating of your
life Becka." He said quietly.
This was not going good.
Where was Jackie Chan when you needed
him?
I slowly raised a foot, everyone looked at
me, it was like time stood still.
My arms raised into the warrior pose
stolen from Sister-thing's Yoga book.
I made a deep low sound in my chest which rose
like a bird into a fearsome: "Aaaaaaaahhhhhh!"
Everyone looked at eachother.
"She nuts." Said Neck.
Not wrong there eh?

Becka M

PIGZ OR ALL THINGS BACON


"Yea'aah!" Says Missy Elliott in my head:"This is a
one time Missy Elliott exclusive!"
But it wasn't, it was just Angela tapping me lightly with
a plastic penis to get my attention.
"I think that champagne challenge might have been ill
advised, look the pigs are coming over."
I looked and like a scene from Dawn of the Dead, Skinner,
Grady and Neck ambled towards me.
"Brains!" I shouted loudly.
"What are you like?" Said Angela but she laughed.
"What's so funny ladies?" Said Grady, he made ladies
sound like bum fluff or maybe used toilet tissues.
"Funny?" Says Angela: "Maybe the prices of these
cocktails, they are extortionate!"
Grady smiled charmingly at her:"I did not mean you
Miss, you I meant". He nudged me with his foot.
"Cat got your tongue?" Lisped Skinner, his eyes glittering
manically.
"Maybe it has, Grady's got yours, it's up his arse you
fuckwit!" I turned away and saw Neck restrain
Skinner.
"I asked you a question, what were you laughing at?"
Grady had that false Jamaican accent that he used to
intimidate lesser mortals.
Like me.
I grinned (the one he hated) and winked ruefully.
"I was just thinking what a fool Alex was to let
you go, I mean a man like you!
What was she thinking to throw it all away for a
super sexy actor rising up on the fast elevator of
success. When she could be hanging here with the
homies watching people who really shouldn't squeeze
into man-made fabrics. Strange huh?"
Angela bit a small paper parasol in half in a desperate
attempt to stop herself laughing.
I looked at Grady.
And froze.
The man was red and sweaty like a rack of bacon,
something was cooking.
Pressure cooking.
Gonna blow.

Becka M

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

COWS

Inspite of the bombing, the worry and panic
that ensued, I found it hard it hard to believe it
had really happened. It had a strange, dream-like
quality, a waking dream. We were lucky, nobody
we know died or were injured. There were
lots of might have beens as so many people could
have traveled that day, or would have been there
if they had not had a sickie etc. Close, very close.
Not to mention all the sex me and Alan had had
on public transport lately. He's now making me
do it in parks, Mal's right I have ruined him. From
sweet guy to pervert what have I done?
I feel quite worried about what I'm going to say now,
it's piffy even after all this, but really I must, it's
driving me. I still hate Justine. I really do. Why?
Times like this you stick together, everything else
is inconsequential right? Right in theory, I practice
everyday but I'm still a shallow bitch. So big bad
wrong! Why I'm so very pissed at Justine is she's
been a bad girl.
Very bad indeed.
So bad I could kill her.
Or at least pull her hair.
She's cheating on Angela!
Already.
Dead- Girl has a bit on the side.
But what is eating me is who it is.
Ruth.
Oh yeah Dead-Girl and Luno Uno have
got it together bigtime. Bloody Ruth she just
doesn't care does she?
Angela phoned me in tears.
"Not my Ruthie!" I said in astonishment, the two
of them had barely made eye contact.
"Yes your Ruthie! Really Becka, I feel so betrayed!
I thought she loved me, I thought she cared! I feel
so old and useless, it's degrading, no offence but
your friend is a nasty little skank. What could Justine
possibly see in her?"
A tongue like silk and magic fingers?
"I agree, she has nothing on you Angie, you were a
real Power Lesbian couple. I'm sorry really." But I
felt like saying I told you so!
"What I want to know is what you are going to do
about it?" Angela's tone was harsh.
"Me? Well I'm sorry girl, I might have been crap at
my job, I might have slept with your son and ruined
your wedding , but I am in no way to blame for
this pile of shit!"
"Would money change anything?"
Aaah my favourite word.
"Of course! Why didn't you say! What do you want me
to do?" I grinned like a virgin in Ann Summers.
"Get Ruthie off my Pookie!" She snapped:"Get her away
from Justine and I swear you can have your job back,
hell have Justine's job! Just help me please."
How could I refuse? I would meet Angela for drinks
and we would see what happens.
But I felt hurt, how could Ruthie have found someone
to replace me already and especially someone I
despised so.
That was it-she was doing it out of spite.
The cows!

Becka M

LONDON EVER MORE

To all in London-my heart and love
goes out to you . Spent most of the morning
frantically phoning folk, all ok but it had been
very close for some of them. I feel sick with anger.
I don't like hating-I'm a lover not a hater!
Can't people just live their lives and get on with
it? Apparently not.

LAZYGIT

Hi guys, just going to have a little time away
from blogging. Will be back soon with fresh
and skanky Mad Becka adventures! Everything
is cool, everything is fine, no worries! See you all
soon and behave!

Rainex & Becka M

SHAG MONSTER

"People, people who need people!" Sang Mal in a
gruff Streisand drawl.
"Shut up Mal!" I kicked him softly in the groin (not
the first time) and no he's never got an erection (with
me anyway).
"I think it's precious! You've turned your beautiful
man into a bigtime pervert!" He clapped his hands
together in joy.
"I haven't have I?" I winced, I'd really enjoyed our
time in public but really it was not everything. To me
anyway.
Alan had a different take on it.
Since that day , we had shagged in a bus shelter, a car,
a park, the garden. Almost anywhere that we might get
caught. I had created a monster!
"You wanted him more adventurous and by hell he is!
He's sexier now too, even I've noticed and skinny tall
mopey men have never been my type!"
"Thanks I'll pass that on to Al, in his present state of
mind I'm sure he'll be delighted."
"Y'think? I think you should be too! But Mickey Straw!
What a man to let go! Oh I'd love to unwrap his piece!"
Mal rolled his eyes.
"Don't be crude! Mickey wasn't mine to let go, I'm glad
it's over, sod him I say!" Did I mean it? Yes I did. Ish.
Sister-thing Raine was different.
Shocked horrified and disgusted were words that sprang
to mind.
"In front of those men?" Her eyes were wide and her
mouth had that kind of chucking up edge to it.
"Yeah, but I would have done it in front of girls, I'm not
sexist." I smirked, bad move, Raine glared at me.
"It's not funny! It's sick, sure we've all had it outside
at some point." She reasoned.
"You? You've had sex? Never!" I feigned astonishment.
"Fuck off! Nobody else grandstands it the way you
do! What were you thinking? Were you thinking? In
the old days you would have been tied to a horse's
tail and dragged through the streets!"
"That would have been cool! What was it like back
then?" I teased, she was only a couple years older, but
I could really make those years count!
"It just makes me uncomfortable, I'm used to Ma and her
men, you and yours, but this is a different level, no good
can come of this. It is bad."
"Don't be that way!" I fluffed her fluffy hair, I hated it
when we fell out.
"I'm not judging you." She said.
"You so are!" I laughed.
"Well maybe a little bit, but it's only because I'm worried
for you. I'd hoped Alan would be a stabilizing influence."
She frowned, I rubbed the crease on her forehead.
"You need botox, look Alan is good really, it's just a faze,
really innocent and silly. Like being kids."
"But you are not kids." Raine said firmly.
It was just fun wasn't it?
Alan was waiting for me when I got back home.
He passed me an envelope. I smiled and opened it.
Inside was two tickets for the Tube.
I looked at him.
He grinned boyishly.
"I thought we might check out the Central Line."
Oh dear.

Becka M
p.s do not say I'm a prude-Rainex

YOU ME AND THEM

"Go down on me, give them a heart attack!" I was
really getting into this.
Alan frowned looked at the heckling, but encouraging
fools in the window and gave them a deep bow. He
stayed down.
Deep down.
It was magic.
"Go for it!" Shouted a muffled voice.
So he did.
With precision licks and nibbles, Al made a weak
woman of me, I was howling and yanking great clumps
of his hair. I was having sex naked in front of strangers!
What the fuck?
But it was good, in a goofy, nutty, crazy 'ho kind of way.
I massaged my own titties to tease my audience, one of
them saluted with his glass and another unzipped his
dick and shook it at me. I winced, not a pretty todger.
Alan abruptly stood up bent me over and rammed me
hard, brutally, deliciously against the window.
The glass was between us but a man still tried to mouth
my nipples. They were baying like dogs. Brutal, male,
sexy, dangerous.
What a racket they were making.
"Stick it to the bitch!" Shouted one.
"Crank it up man!" Said another.
Mmm, not sex talk, this was war.
War against my cunt.
Whose side was Alan on anyway?
He was grinning. I turned around and bit his cheek.
"They are starting to turn me off." I whispered.
"Not yet! This is too good!" Alan relished every thrust.
"What a slapper! Give her some more! Twist those
tits!"
Twist those tits? Aw fuck off! I stuck out my tongue
and being deft of hip swivelled so rapidly and
abruptly Alan roared as he came. I can get a guy up
but I'm also good at getting them down when I want.
And I did.
"Shows over guys!" I said.
"Doesn't have to be!" Said one of the men: "Let's bring
in the troops!"
Alan and I looked at eachother-shit they were leaving
the window, they were moving out. We could hear them
plundering through the house. They were coming.
For me.
Maybe even for Alan.
Like scared but naughty kids we legged it as we
were, Alan trousers undone, me naked in high heels.
I scooped my dress up on the way out.
I didn't stop running inspite of a few stares from people
and someone taking my photo saying:"I love London!"
In a Polish accent. At last I could slip my dress over my
sweaty skin. Home and dry.
Well maybe not dry.
Or home.
But safe. I kissed Alan.
"You really liked that didn't you?" I said.
He pulled a face :"I did. I'm as fucked as you now."
"Never." I said and hailed a black cab.

Becka M

LICKINGWINDOWS

"Marry me straight away if you like!" I said and
bodily pushed and shoved Alan into a convenient
back garden. Very Quadraphenia, very daring!
Though this was no back alley! This was Wimpole
street! Wimp-Hole, mmm, couldn't I just?
"What are you doing?" He said in a theatrical whisper:
"We will get arrested for breaking and entry!"
"Nothing is broken, I'll focus on the entry though!"
I pulled up my skirt and lowered my peach coloured
frenchies. Alan looked defeated.
"We can't, look lets get back, we can talk, we can fuck,
not here, it's so crude, so very......." His voice trailed
off as I opened my pussy with my fingers.
"Come to Momma!" I said and my inner lips mimed the
words.
Alan looked around, the garden was very pretty, Alan
Titchmarsh and Monty Don we salute you as someone
had obviously taken your words to heart. Flowers,
water features, decking (though that is passe now)
and a beautiful willow tree.
"No, my flesh is weak:" (Not from where I was standing
it wasn't!) "I simply can't do this in a back garden! It's
seedy, it's so nasty!" He winced but his bulge was showing
bigtime! Where there is a willy there is a way. The Becka
way. Come As You Are the Nirvana song could have been
written about me, if Curt had known me he would still be
here today, still be fucked up though. I would have seen to
that!
I stood with my back against the big tree, I undid my dress
and let it fall to the ground. It was humid but my nipples
stood to attention. I tweaked them.
"Becka it's not even 4 'o'clock!" Alan wailed:" We could
get seen!" But he gravitated towards me, linked and beloved,
magnetic energy between dick and hoo-ha.
"Well you had better be quick then!" I nagged.
He groaned:"You guttersnipe! Love it rough don't you?"
He entered me smoothly.
"Hey less of the guttersnipe! I'll have you know my father
is titled!" I bit his cheek and felt the bark of the tree warm
and ticklish against my bottom. I wrapped my legs around
his back and felt him lift me practically by his dick alone,
so hard was it.
Then we heard cheering-turning we saw at least six men
laughing and encouraging us from the one of the windows!
"Shit!" Said Alan, I must admit it turned me on bigtime.
"Let's really give them something to look at." I purred
into his ear.
"My god madam, what do you have in mind?"
At last he was getting it and so was I!

Becka M

READ MY LIPS

Patrick and I made it out of the club (being briefly
stopped by Ironknickers to pay the wine bill and a
fine for smoking). Next second Mickey came running
out and grabbed me tightly.
"I'll not let you fuck up our lives girl! This is our
time now!" His eyes were flashing like fireworks
and he seemed genuine. I bit my lip and thought
of Ruthie, Alan, everything. Mickey began to try
to erase everything with passion. He kissed my face,
hair and neck frantically, for a millisecond I responded.
"Quite demonstrative isn't he?" Said Patrick
sanguinely, I rolled my eyes and snapped out of it.
"No Mick, it's over, gone, finshed!" I tried to wriggle
free but his arms were now clamped around my waist
holding me captive.
"I love you I love you I love you." He said over and
over, making me feel terrible, but what could I do?
Alan was right, Mick had had many chances with
me and he chose Sharon.
Next Alan came out, his long coat flapped like
feathers of a sad bird, he caught sight of me
being tightly held by Mickey boy and flinched.
"Wait!" I said and tore myself free from the
past. But Alan didn't wait, he kept on moving,
head down, hair hanging, if he'd been 25yrs
years younger he'd have been a Goth.
"Becka!" Shouted Mickey, I ignored him and
he didn't pursue me. Patrick waved and grinned
like a fox. The old git! Mickey shook his head
and I swear I saw tears, but it might have been
a reflection or something. Tough guys don't cry-
especially hardnosed (and arsed) cops. Not my
problem, he was over and out, but my future
was running away from me.
"Will you just wait!" I panted, Alan had even longer
legs then me, he could cover some ground! I could
hardly keep up. This went on for about 10 minutes-
at one point some Japanese tourists started to follow
us as they thought we were actually going somewhere!
They took a picture of Al though, worryingly they
ignored me. Maybe they really did think he was
Professor Snape. Or Alan Rickman, that was worrying
too as Al was more then 10 years younger.
Alan began to mutter something I could not quite catch.
"Sorry?" I said.
"No point." He said tightly:"This is going to go on and
on, this mess, all of it! Had enough Becka, can't
share you anymore, let's just finish it eh? Cleanly,
lovingly." Abruptly he stopped walking and looked into
my sweaty and red face. I was not prepare and did
not look the part for grand romantic gestures. So I
did my best. Mal would have been proud of me and
Ruthie would have chucked up.
My turn. I grabbed his ratty old coat and pulled
him to me. I could make this work, it was what I wanted.
"Read my lips, I LOVE YOU, YOU BASTARD." And
kissed him soundly. His eyebrows shot up about a
foot and I felt his mouth trying to smile under mine.
A lovely thing. But I still had work to do.

To be continued................

Becka M

TIME AND SPACE (Part Twat)

I gulped and looked at Patrick for help, he shrugged,
oh great another shrugger!
I looked at Mickey Straw so damned sure he had me
by the short and curlies the cockney bastard!
I looked at Alan, his white face set and brooding.
"It is true Mickey wants me back." I said slowly.
Alan shut his eyes like he couldn't stand the pain.
"I see." He said.
"No you don't."I reached across and stroked his face,
so thin and tight like stretched leather.
"You are the one that I want." I said then realized
what I'd said! Oh shit! In my head Travolta and Newton-
John sang away, oooh oooh oooh. I blushed. Could I fuck
it up further? What cheese could I add to this spread?
Anyone for Edam?
"Sod off!" This was Mick:"He's cheated on you with
your best friend, I would never do that!"
It was true, Alan had in a moment of complete insanity
and because she was blackmailing him, shagged Ruth.
"You have cheated with me, what about your wife!
So shut up!" I snapped. Patrick lit his cigar at the table
and grinned wolfishly:"Your turn." He said to Alan.
"My turn? Oh thank you." He said his voice dripping
with sarcasm. Patrick actually laughed. "Becka this
crazy life of yours is sending me mad! Marry me or
leave me, no more in between, I've had enough of it!
You should be ashamed!" (This was to Mickey)"Call
yourself a Copper! Hardly a pillar of the community,
more like a pimp!"
Mickey's face darkened and his eyes bulged:"You have
called me Copper one too many times son!" Next minute
his fist flew across the table and connected with Alan's
jaw with a snap!"
I shrieked and grabbed Alan to stop him from falling to
the floor. Patrick was on his feet and barred the way
so that Mickey could not get near us.
"Alan!" I cried and held his head in my hands.
"Wow that hurt!" He muttered.
A woman screamed:"Call the police!"
Mickey smiled:"I am the police ma'am, nothing to see
here."
But there was, Alan started laughing as he always does
when he gets stressed.
"Detective Straw this is quite unseemly can you desist?"
Said Patrick calmly in his politician's voice.
"Let's take it outside shall we?" Said Alan and pulled
himself up. "This is what you wanted eh Becks? Two
men fighting over you. Well you got it!"
My turn to get angry.
"You silly twat! I've never wanted that! And don't
flatter me so, I know you are fighting Mick because
you hate him, so just leave me out eh? You two hate
eachother so much there must be some sort of
primal attraction!"
"Oh explain?" Said Mickey.
"Maybe you should date eachother instead! Bum
eachother and stop fucking with my head!" I stood
up and took Patrick's arm.
"I love you Alan and I will marry you, but if you think
I'm going to watch two great oafs hit eachother then you
have another thing coming! Patrick lets leave."
"Oh!" Said Patrick:"Don't spoil my fun!"
"You sound like a vampire, leave it!" I scolded.
"I don't fancy Straw, he's bloody simian!" Muttered
Alan. Mickey kissed his teeth like a Jamaican.
"You stupid cunt! Think you are so superior." His
eyes looked like fireworks reflected in a meth's
bottle. I exhaled and started to leave.
"You walk away from me girl and that's it!" Warned
Mickey, he leaned forward:"Are you forgetting your
dear darling dada? I still haven't told you everything."
"Or anything!" I whispered back.
"What are they saying?" Demanded Alan to Patrick.
"Sex stuff I should think." Said Patrick with a nod
and tapped the side of his nose.
"Mickey, screw you. Alan when you've finished acting
like an arse I'll be at your house."
We walked through the tables like people on a red
carpet, namely everyone was staring at us.
"Don't look back." Said Patrick.
"Oh god are they still fighting?" I said and winced.
"No, they are kissing." Said Patrick, I looked at him
and we both cracked up laughing. What a life!


Becka M

TIME AND SPACE (Part Duh!)

"I see." Said Patrick and shot me a look:"So you
don't want to me to ask him to join us?"
Patrick had a mischievous sparkle in his eye, I
glared at him.
Alan jolted like he'd had an electric shot:"Go on then!
Ask the big Copper over, I'm sure Becka will be really
pleased!" The napkin was getting it now, twisted into
what looked like a noose-oh dear!
"Please don't!" I said and took a huge gulp of red wine.
But Mickey had been watching us, he swaggered
over like a wide-boy on a saturday night. He smiled at
Patrick, smirked at Alan and leered at me!
"Join us Michael." Said Patrick, this was the first time
since meeting my father that I was less then delighted,
he was acting like an arse!
"Don't mind if I do!" Mickey sat legs open wide,
absolutely the most alive and vigorous person in
the room. I felt Alan tense like a spring next to me, I
touched his hand, he was so into eyeballing Mickey
my touch made his hand jump and knock the
carafe of red wine everywhere! We looked as the red
seeped across the pristine linen, Patrick and Mickey
laughed, Alan was mortified, I was pissed off.
"Calm down!" I whispered into Alan's ear.
"Yeah! Hey presto I'm calm, look I'm sitting with
your Truncheon buddy and everything is cool!"
Alan hissed back.
A waiter quickly changed the cloth, Patrick scanned
the menu and Mickey was still giggling into his
sleeve. He pretended to cough: "Nnnnerrrd!"
It sounded like! Alan did not miss it though.
"Becka I'm sorry but really-how could you sleep
with this big ape?"
"Oh!" I said, why did I have to be dragged into this
shit? Ok ok it's all my fault-but even so!
"She said that often!" Said Mickey.
"Mick!" I said aghast.
"Too much information." Said Patrick:"I'm going
for a smoke, Rebecca if they start to fight, call
for me, I'd hate to miss anything interesting!"
"Oh like I'd fight Professor Snape here!" Laughed
Mickey cruelly and it was wrong, Alan deserved
better then that.
"You are acting like a wanker Mick! Alan go with
Patrick and have a cigarette."
"So you want to be alone with Bodie, now I
understand!"
"I just want you to calm down that's all!" I pleaded.
Patrick still hovered, really he was acting up!
"Just answer me this Detective Straw, if you care
so bloody much for Becka why did you marry
Sharon? You could have been with Becka from
school, but she's never been quite good enough
for you has she?" Alan was shaking.
Mickey stood and for once his grin was gone, his
eyes like ice.
"I'm not perfect, mistakes were made. But I
want Becka back properly, marriage even! Oh she
didn't tell you?" The grin rose triumphantly.
Alan turned to look at me.
"Say it isn't so!"
Patrick rubbed his hands together with glee.
"It's true, he does want me back." I said tightly.
"That's my girl!" Said Mickey.
Alan's mouth fell open-what happened next
oooh soon!

Becka M

TIME AND SPACE (Part uh!)

That was what I needed, time to sort out my
stupid head, space to figure out if a marriage
proposal was what I wanted. So I stalled.
"I want you to meet my father properly." I
said;"You might not want to be related to him."
Poor Patrick! So maligned because I could never
say yes to anything other then a shag!
"Oh God! You want me to ask him for your
hand don't you?" Said Alan aghast.
"No." I shook my head:"Just meet him, it's
important for me to know that you will get
along. Then I will give you my answer."
"Say we don't? Say we hate eachother's
cologne or something?" Alan's dark eyes
drove into me, he knew I was stalling.
"You both smell good, it won't be a problem."
I assured him.
"You are a cow." He said sadly, but yes I'd
talked him around and he would lunch with
Patrick and it would be all jolly good fun!
But it wasn't, it was shit!
We met in a swish private club, Tory of course,
where the receptionist was a woman with steely
eyes and hair and a bad case of pomposity.
"Yahs?" She said like a Sloane victim.
"We are here to lunch with Sir Patrick Beamish."
I said in my best pretend voice. She looked at
me doubtfully and pityingly at Alan.
"Rebecca Martin and guest?" She said looking
at my Primark dress and Alan's usual black/black
garb.
"That's us." I confirmed, I felt my head start to
sweat.
"If you would like to follow me through?" She
beckoned to us, I had an irrestistable urge to
run away, but that was childish so I resisted it!
We were led through the dark panelling and
dark leather, very old school, though with a bit
of swooshing it could have doubled as an S&M
club. Probably did.
The restaurant area was almost entirely made up
of elderly men, though some had young hot girls
with them, probably called Millie, or Flora.
Daughters I guessed, or socialite girls who didn't
mind a few wrinkles as long as the pound signs
kept rolling.
"What a fucking awful place!" Hissed Alan into my
ear. I shushed him.
Patrick sat alone looking wonderful, Peter Cushing,
Van Helsing even, more alive then any of these
stiffs.
"Sir Beamish, your guests." Said Iron Knickers.
"Thank you Emily." He said and winked, the old
crow actually blushed and ducked her head.
"May be she doubles as Money Penny to his
elderly Bond?" Offered Alan.
"Bastard." I hissed to him, he was on form I'll give
him that.
"Patrick I'd like you to meet Alan, Alan Sir Patrick
Beamish." I said without saying the Dad word.
The men shook hands. This would be good.
Then I clocked Mickey Straw staring at me from
the bar, he winked.
"What's that Copper doing here?" Said Alan.
"He's my bodyguard, why?" Said Patrick.
"Nice choice." Said Alan bitterly.
"Rebecca seems to know him ." Said Patrick keenly.
"Oh you could say that, couldn't he Becks?"
I grinned horribly.
"An old friend." I said to Patrick, he smiled
his knowing smile. Damn that Straw.
"But he was at that awful wedding the other
time and you said nothing." Said Patrick.
I squirmed on my seat this was intense.
"It's complicated." Said Alan and began to
idly pick a rose apart that dressed the
table. I looked transfixed as he wrent
the petals. Poor rose.
"Shall I ask him to wait outside if he's
making you uncomfortable?" Said Patrick
also watching those leaves fall.
"Can you make him stand in front of a
bus please?" Said Alan and turned to
stare at Mickey much as a Pitbull would
stare at a rottweiller.

Believe me it got worse.
Ciao
Becka M

THE MMM WORD

I saw the prints.
"Oh god no!" I said and looked again just incase my brain
hadn't taken in the information correctly. It had.
"Bloody hell, I look like the Child Catcher!" I wailed.
"I think you look sweet." Cooed Mal :"Like a young
Heddy Lamar, after she's had a few jars!"
Alan laughed:"I think they make you look quite
intelligent, like Barbra Streisand when she's wearing
glasses."
"But I aint wearing glasses!" I said tightly, watching the
men smirk and laugh at me. The fools.
"Well then?" Said Mal and looked at his feet.
"Indeed." Said Alan. Then they creased up. Hmm,
they were getting much too pally, I didn't think
they had any common ground. But they did have-me.
The butt of every joke and innuendo, pigs!
I'd have to have words with those twins though!
I flounced out carrying my shot-horrors.
I phoned Patrick.
"Miss you." I said.
"Shall we lunch tomorrow? Bring that man of
yours, the gloomy one."
"I'll do that, but he might put you off the food."
"I'll take the risk, need to shed a few pounds
after all." He laughed his dirty, fruity laugh.
"Not going for it are you? The PM job?"
"No! I'm much too lazy for that and I fear too
old. But never mind I've my sights set on other
pastures now." He said conspiratorially. Hmm.
I wondered just what trouble he was in, the
trouble that Mickey Straw had hinted at.
Later after Mal had left Alan sat watching
Pulp Fiction while I tried to read The Portrait
of Dorian Gray. Very apt after my photos! (Except
I was already fucked up!)
"Bruce Willis looks like your Copper friend
in this film." Said Alan. I felt my cheeks
redden, we had reached the bit when he was in
the shower.
"Oh really?" I feined disinterest.
"You know he does!" Said Alan and hit me on
the back of the head with the banana skin
he had in his hand.
"Do you mind? I'll get all that gunk in my hair!"
This seemed to be a secret signal for him to
go beserk!
He pinned me on the floor and dangled the
already minging peel onto my face.
"Yuck! Stop it!" I spluttered.
Next minute I'd grabbed the front of his shirt
and not realising my own strength had torn
it open, pfhth, went the buttons.
"Sorry." I said cheesily.
"That was a Saville Row! Come here!" Alan
tore off my brand spanking new Juicy Courture
T Shirt right down the middle!
"I'll give you bananas!" Said Alan and reached
for a fresh one. The glint in his eye was wicked.
"Don't peel it!" I warned:"Ruth had one break
inside of her once."
"Lovely, now open wide for the dentist man!"
He eased the fruit gently inside of me, the skin
felt very cold, that alone was a huge turn on.
With one hand he worked the banana gently,
this was not rape by fruit but seduction, he
gently parted my hoo-ha with his other hand
and caress the sodden folds.
"Ahhh." I'm too easy, wish I could hold back
more, his tongue lapped at my edges like
a cat drinking milk:"Mmm, nice." I murmured.
"Manage two?" He said and for a horrible moment
I though he was going to shove one up my arse!
But no, he meant his own, personal banana.
This fitted very well into my ready lips.
"I fucking love you!" He said in a mock chav voice.
When he came it hit the back of my throat almost
choking me, he pulled me up and swiftly removed
the banana. Alan held me against his warm lovely
chest.
"Marry me?" He said.
I said:"!!!!!!!"

Becka M

OFF

"Come on please Becka, take it off it will look
soooo much better!" coerced Quinn.
"Leave her alone, let her do what she feels
comfortable with." Snapped Alan.
I was sitting under Alan's tree being photographed
by the sex-twins, talk about putting you on
the spot!
"I want it off, so much more natural." Said Jude.
"Go on Becks, take it off, we won't laugh honestly."
Wheedled Quinn.
"I personally thinks she looks very nice wearing
one, like a lady." Said Alan (my hero).
"She's a laydeee!" Said Quinn in a Little Britain
voice.
"It will look wilder without one, freer, more
you Becks." Said Jude.
"For Chrissake take it off ! If anything just to shut
these two up!" Groaned Alan. He had on a panama
hat, that would have to go.
I sighed, I had to give them what they wanted,
with a pause I watched the three men looking
at me intensely, then I took it off, slowly,
deliberately I let it fal to the ground. All eyes
were on me. Cool just the way I like it.
Or rather I should say out, the small butterfly
clip that held my fringe back. My hair flopped
messily to my cheekbones-a restyle was long
overdue.
"That's better." Said Quinn.
"What a star!" Said Jude.
I shook my hair and laughed as Alan rolled
his eyes in exasperation.

Becka M

LETS HEAR IT FOR THE BOYZ

I'm still staying here at Alan's, he won't let me
leave he says, until I have somewhere half decent
to go to. Mmm, part of me says, yay he loves me,
part of me thinks, he doesn't love me enough or he'd
ask me to stay permanently. Anyway I'm here and
loving every minute of being a proper girlfriend!
I had a close call this morning.
The too close bit was when I awoke still sleep rumpled
and drowsy to find the sexy twins Jude and Quinn
sitting on the end of my bed looking for all the world
like the very worse kind of temptation.
"Hello Becka!" Said Jude and leered.
"Gorgeous." Said Quinn with his usual warmth.
I was naked, if I had a dick it would have been hard.
"Uh hi guys." I mumbled suddenly shy (funny that)
and pulled the duvet tighter around me.
"What are you two doing in here?" Says Alan:"Out!
Come on, in the kitchen." He looked at me with
exasperation, I hadn't done anything! Except in my
head! Trust Alan to think of me in that Mrs Robinson
way!
We breakfasted together, almost like a family and
the twins enthused about going to Australia, this
was it they said, they were moving on with their
lives and starting their own business as photographers.
"Lots of sexy people to take photos of on Bondi beach."
I said through a mouthful of streudl, Alan feeds me the
weirdest stuff honestly.
"No." Said Jude:"We are going to work solely in black
and white and take photos of the lost souls. You know
winos, prostitutes, street kids."
"Sounds cheery." Said Alan.
"Can we snap you Becka darling?" Said Quinn and
under the table squeezed my knee. I choked on a
piece of apple.
"Because she looks like a prostitute?" Said Alan and
there was a warning edge to his voice.
"No, it's your broken nose, it's gorgeous, so odd in your
lovely face, it's disfiguring but beautiful." Said Jude.
"That is what we want, marred beauty." Said Quinn.
"Well thanks a fucking bunch!" I snapped and rubbed my
nose:"Maybe you would like to pay for a nosejob for me
when you've hit the bigtime?" I rose from the table with
my cheeks flaming, bastards!
"Don't be like that Becks!" Said Quinn:"We wouldn't hurt
you for the world! And of course when we could afford
it you can have anything!"
I sat down again.
"Continue." I said.
"Oh you sad mercenary bitch." Said Alan and began
to read the times.

Becka M

SOAPY NICE

Alan doesn't have so much as a six pack as a
rack of ribs, so skinny is he. Still I traced each
rib with my tongue and paying attention to his
nipples, I chewed hard. Alan like most men is
take it or leave it with nipple play, why, he says,
play with them when you have a nice hard cock
to hand? Because I want to that's why! I had him
yelping, hopefully in pleasure! He rubbed soap
into my breasts with his silly, school-boyish
enthusiasm, I decided that he needed to be
taught a few lessons.
I began to work my way down to his already
twitching dong, our first attempt had been brutal
and sweet but he was far too excited and came
only after about 3 minutes. This time I was in the
driving seat and hell was this mother going to ride!
"What do you want from me?" He said teasingly.
"In the bedroom now!" I shouted.
"Get you." He said and carried me from the bathroom
to the bedroom, leaving large wet footprints (those
very same footprints that I would slip on in a
couple of hours and hit my head off the coffee table.
But that was 2 hours away!) All the time I licked
and bit (like a scrabbling puppy really) any flesh
I could reach.
"You are insatiable! I'm never going to be enough
for you am I?" He said ruefully and plunged me
onto his chocolate coloured quilt.
"You are enough, just do as I say Mr!" I put on
my stern dominatrix face.
"Oh please, you are not with Skinner you know!
Can't we have straight sex without all your
antics?"
"Nope! Lay back!" I ordered, he rolled his eyes
like the long suffering sap that he was.
"Take that face off!" I snapped.
"It's the only one I've got!" He laughed.
"Enough of your cheek! Talking of which, turn over!"
"Fuck off, if there is one thing I hate, then it's
my arse being manipulated."
"Not you're choice! Now spread them soldier!"
I sat on his warm back, still slightly wet and
smelling delicious.
"You are not serious! Hello, my prick is on the other
side!" He laughed.
"Yeah? What about this then?" I inserted a finger
into his rectum.
"Becka!" He growled, I bared down and pushed
my weight onto him. "I could rape you if I wanted."
"That's it!" He roared and suddenly I was rolled
over and he was on top.
"Like it rough? Rough it is!" Snarling to reveal his
mad teeth he began to thrust into me as hard
as he could.
"That's nothing!" I laughed, he pulled me up so we
were sitting face to face and he began to yank
at my hair, my breasts, everything really! I
shuddered on him and sank my teeth into his earlobe.
"Ouch! So she's not over yet then? We'll see about
that!" He stuck out an arm and knocked his phone,
water, books and glasses flying to the floor from
his bedside cabinet. I was plonked unceremoniously
on it.
"Gee Alan, there is no need to put me on a pedestal
really you know!" I giggled, he smiled for 1 second
and began to use the cabinet as leverage for his
thrusts, bloody hell it made a racket and a half!
Worked though, I was soon riding high on another
great orgasm, this time he joined me.
We crashed to the floor and laid there panting.
Later that night he would ask me to stay (to
clean up the mess!)

Becka M

TOUCHING

"Oh no, what do you want?" Said Alan, only
partially joking as he opened the door to his
house. He looked very put out and rumpled,
his black and grey streaked hair flopped onto his
face and he was dressed in a grey t-shirt and
and black joggers, bare feet.
"Nice way to talk to me!" I kissed his cheek as I
pushed past him.
"Do you know I get a headache everytime I see
you, talk to you or even think about you. Why
do you think that is?" He asked and led me through
to his dark and stylish kitchen.
"I have that effect on some people, could be worse,
could be a tumour." I grinned at him and opened
his fridge. Mmm chardonnay yum, I began to look
for the cork screw.
"Oh that's a lovely thing to say and why, may I ask,
have you brought all your stuff with you?" He looked
scared bless him.
"I just want to stay tonight, if you don't mind, tomorrow
I'm looking at some rented flats and bedsits." The cork
came out with a pop I sniffed it, Alan watched me
intensely.
I poured two tall glasses of wine and passed him one.
"Thanks." He said:"I was actually saving this wine
for a dinner party next week, but ok we'll drink it now."
(That was his way of telling me off for being a cheeky
cow and not asking him first before I opened the bottle).
"What party? Who are you taking?" I asked with interest.
"I'm there to make up the table as they have a spare
female, don't worry about it, I'm not." He sipped his drink
and looked away.
I frowned, now I was getting a headache! I hated the bitch
already.
"Well tell her hands off! You have me remember?" I pouted,
in my head she was a young glamorous blonde of about 24,
perfect teeth and tits like watermelons.
Alan smiled tightly:" I have you? I don't think so, I know
you cheat on me Becks. I must be crazy being in love
with you." His mouth looked very bitter, I had to
cheer him up.
I gulped my wine and decided to ignore his remark.
Instead I took off my clothes and stood there naked.
"Fucking hell." He said thickly.
"I'm just having a shower." I said (some people seem to
think I have a hygiene problem, can't think why Lindy!!)
"You are welcome to join me if you want."
I walked past without looking back, inside the cubicle,
he had one of those fantastic power showers, I set it
to massage. I began to soap up and for one horrible
second I thought that he would not be joining me.
The screen pulled back and there Alan stood, still
dressed, wine glass in hand, head on the side looking
at me approvingly.
I splashed the spray at him. "Come in, I said and
tweaked my nipples, ah this was great, it was washing
away the stain of Jasper and all the other shit.
So Alan climbed in, still dressed, wine glass and all.
"You daft bugger!" I laughed.
"Daft about you!" He set down the glass and began to
peel off his soaking clothes. His body so thin and
muscular, never and I don't care about Jeff or Mickey,
have I been so turned on by a body.
I knelt down and began to to roll my tongue around
his dick, not quite a blow, more of a swirl. He pulled
me up urgently, turning me around he stuck his
dick deeply in from behind. I sighed. This was what it
was all about. His hands held my breasts tightly,
quite painfully, I could feel his back arching, his legs
trembling with the strain and pleasure.
This was what it was all about!

Becka M