Sunday, July 04, 2010

MAJESTIC


When I finally had it out with Ruth it was like a
kettle boiling over eeeeeeeeeeee!

"You don't like Simon do you?" Accused Ruth with her eyes
hot and flashing like Chucky.

" Yeah sure I like him just fine, this man who stole
my best friend and turned her into Stepford Wife without
the dress sense. This man that thinks every second that I
am going to jump his wife's bones and thinks that I am a
bad influence when in fact little Ruthie is the biggest
ho of them all, she put the Ho in Hobnobs and the knobs too.
Yes thrilled, absolutely delighted, ticketyboo oh joyous
union." I actually snarled, cool huh?

Ruth chewed her babyish lips.

"Is this because you could not be a bridesmaid?" She
asked amazingly.

"Well that was an issue, amongst a cast of thousand
others. Just what the hell are you doing with him?
Did this dude actually fuck your brains out? Cos you
are acting pretty well lobotomised from where I am
standing."

"You are so crude. You just don't want me to be happy
do you? Maybe you are jealous that I have a man that
actually wanted to marry me and you, look you have nothing!
Even your hot figure is going to pot." She glared at me
and I glared right back at her, we were a second from rolling
around on the floor with each other's hair in our hands.

"That will be it Ruth, I am a ugly fat arsed hag without a
man or shag and you are a fantastic worthy surrendered wife.
Whats not to covet?" I was leaving, the adrenalin was making
my hands sweat and I ached to put them around Ruth's throat.
How could she turn on me like this? When I had never ever
turned on her, not really not even when she was blackmailing Alan
and such. (Previous one hundred year ago entry)

I felt like leaving because I was gonna cry and I don't like
that very much.

I also began to think maybe I was a little jealous, but Simon
was a monster and I didn't want a husband like that, or come to
think of it a loco wife like Ruthie.

"I'm sorry Becks,maybe you don't understand it, but please
I am so happy it hurts, let this ride out and I am sure Simon
will forgive you in time." She put her hand on my arm and squeezed.


EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE kettle and boiling point reached.

"FORGIVE ME? FUCK SAKE RUTH! Whatever have I done that needs forgiveness
for from Simon? Everything we did was years ago, BEFORE Simon, he has no
right at all to be jealous or forgive me!" I was aghast, she had
fucking lost her mind to talk to me like that without a warning!

"Becka I love you, maybe if you came to our church to show willing?"
Ruth pleaded.

"Oh this is sooo good. Church! What next? C'mon just don the
sack cloth and ashes, they will go nice with your ugly clothes and
sad hair. Take the stick out of your arse whilst we're at it eh?"

Less then a minute later I was on the street. Fuck, what a mess. This
one not of my causing.

I headed straight down the tube station at Oxford circus, swiped my
oyster card and sat muttering to myself for the next 15 mins to I
changed to the Northern line.

There was a delay so I bought some chocolate to help with my fat arse
it was a Yorkie and I ate it 3 squares just trying to get the sugar and
fat into my heart broken bod. I sat there panting with my head in my hands,
next I lurched for the bin as chocolate and morning croissant did an encore.

"Disgusting!" Said a woman with a Sainsburys bag.

"Dibby skant." Said a teenage black kid.

" What happened to you?" Said Alan.

Alan?!

I gave him a big sickly chocolate coated smile.


Best Becka xxxxx

(C'mon guys I'm loney out here! Say something even if
it's fuck off loser, negative comments are
better then nada love Rainex)

1 comment:

Lindy said...

sorry chickie, didn't mean to appear to have deserted you. I'm just waiting for the shit to start hitting the fan! Love ya!!! And I'm still with ya!