Wednesday, May 11, 2005

CRAPOLA!

Ok I once did a psychology course, you can infact
use your mind to do many great and wonderful things.
I used it in this instant to blot out the strange, nasty
old cunt and focus instead on the very lovely Johnny
Depp. You do this by keeping your eyes SHUT!
So it was Johnny who gently slid my knickers down
(the ones with the see-thru heart), it was Johnny who
placed a finger on the sharp bone above my clit
and pressed down firmly.
I began to feel myself moisten and ooze, I felt that
weird, prickly feeling that meant I was very close
to coming.
"You are lovely." Said Johnny, how I wished he was
dressed as Captain Jack Sparrow! So he was, complete
with gold teeth and eyeliner.
I was throbbing but still he touched nothing vital, instead
he teased me by tracing the shape of my landing strip
hairs and stroking high between my thighs.
I moaned with desire, my nipples poked through the
ridiculous tart's nightie like walnuts on a whip.
He reached down and began to lick the edges of my
pussy.
"Please!" I mumbled, I needed something substantial,
a finger, a dick, anything to fill the aching hole with
something hard and unyielding.
He didn't have to touch me, I felt his breath warm
on my labia and I had the most stunning orgasm
ever! I wrapped my legs tightly around Johnnie's
neck!
Then I fell back into my sumptuous, sex torn bed
on the sofa.
Then something banged against my lips.
My eyes snapped open.
Old hanging dry balls and a dick that looked like
it had been pickled slapped against my face.
Jeez!
"Get the fuck Off me!" I roared and pushed him
away. He laughed.
"Always another time Rebecca." Jasper said
fondly.
"Have a coronary why don't you?" I hid under the
pillow. After awhile he left me to it.
I counted the roll of twenties, £200! Well that would
start my wardrobe off again.
But I felt bad, like a whore or something, Jasper!
I did not want to think about it!
Later that night I began to dream that I was on a
cruise with Alan and Patrick, both had white suits and
stripy Breton style tops. They smiled and raised
glasses of wine to me. Alan waved a roll of money
which seemed odd and Patrick seemed to find
this funny, I shrugged and looked away. Then I
could see Ruthie and Alex sunbathing and I felt the
sun warm my skin. I smiled, then I realized I still had
on the nightie, I looked around for something to change
into.
Then Captain Jack Sparrow was capering along,
I laughed and he pulled down his trousers
and showed me his dick. It was Jasper's old tool!
He was saying:"Take it in your mouth dear."
I woke shaking and sweating. I cried into my pillow,
what had I done?
Becka M

8 comments:

Lindy said...

You fucked yourself forever with the image of Johnny Depp. And me too!!

Rainex said...

Doh Lindy! I never thought of
that! Sorry, I'm sure Mr Depp's
man is wide, thick and long
without a sagging ball in sight.

Whoah there Storm-Johnny!
Thanks for stopping, such
self control. Particulary
liked the SLAM part.

Foxsden said...

Oi Storm Trooper! shes blogging dude.. not cybering with you!

Rainex said...

Storm-whatever floats your
boat-your writing is quite
descriptive!

ML-thanks for sticking up
for me kid, I am after all
Sister-thing Raine and not
naughty Becks! Still have a
stinking cold though and look
a vaguely yellowish colour.
Must be the brandy or Blossom
Hill!

Foxsden said...

Mleh.. Just read your as usual excellent post and then the subgenus psychobabble in the comments box. Someone needs to go have a wank.

Jus pardon me Im the bitchy red queen this week!

Suggest copious amounts of Gin for my stinking rage and your jaundice!

Rainex said...

No worries ML, I'm a
couple of years older then
you-after awhile you just
don't care! I would love
to feel your rage, but at
this time happy just to feel
a lucozade bottle against
my sticky forehead!
I hate being ill, normally
when I have time off from
work, I shag, walk dog, shop
etc Now I sit like some used
banana skin wondering whether
domestoes really would take
those greasy looking yellow
circles from under my eyes!
Yours in sufferance-Rainex

Rainex said...

Thanks Storm, I'm
just the worst patient.
D can't stand me near him,
must be all those Strepsils
I keep sucking!
But I haven't farted into a
tub of jelly yet-I'll save
that for my swan song!

Rainex said...

Miss Macy
you really stick up for
your guy don't you?
I do appreciate Storm,
he has a cracking sense of
humour and a gift for the
absurd (which let's face it
is what we all need)
Feeling better today so will
actually write a new entry!