30 SICKS


I'm a birthday girl, what am I doing? I'm sitting in a layby
with Angie spying on my Ex best friend and her cadaverous
girlfriend-hostage.
I feel very Cagney and Lacey, although I am far too slim to
be Lacey, I'm not blonde enough to be Cags. Who am I
kidding? Myself as usual but it keep s me happy and
off the street.
Angie is looking good. Oh my word does she. Still heavy,
but a diet of worry and lack of sleep have trimmed those
stubborn pounds.
"Look at that bitch!" Hissed Angela Grade.
I peered at the two fair heads held tight together in
the Ford Ka and shrugged.
"Which bitch?"
"Your bitch!"
"Oh Ruthie, yeah, not classy like Justine but a real trooper."
I nodded approvingly.
"God almighty!" Angela laughed strangely.
"What?" I enquired as I lit a small cafe cigar as it made
me feel Stacey Keach.
"You still after everything like her, don't you?" Her voice
was heavy with accusation. Trouble with Angie heaviness,
food, words, sex, all calorie laden and triple thick goodness.
I winced. Yeah I did like her.
I liked alcohol, cigars, cigarettes, anonymous sex.
All bad for me though.
Why not a complete psycho?
"Ruth is my heart. Anything else is just going through
the motions." I said finally.
"I hate you sometimes." Said Angela darkly. I had hurt her
too the quick. She had loved me and I had rejected her
for a guy, now here I was flaunting hot girl action in front
of her.
"Whoops." I said.
"Indeed." She said sourly.
"Look, all can be salvaged, I'll grab Ruthie, you get Justine,
just don't grab her too tightly, she'll snap. Everyone a winner
and we both get the girl." I half shut my eyes:"Life is good."
Then Ruthie stepped out of the car with Justine, she held
a menacing little gun to her head.
"Becka! This is your birthday present, I'll blow out her
brains for you." Screamed Ruth. Yeah what every girls
wants, not diamonds, holidays in the sun, no just body
matter hitting the kerb. Groovy.
"Um chocolates work better actually." But I was shaking.
"Think fast you cunt!" Said Angie (this was to me in
case you were wondering.)
I got out of the car slowly, like a professional wuss I held
my hands above my head.
"Tell Meatfeast to stay in the car!" Shrieked Ruth.
"Charming!" Muttered Angie.
Justine's eyes were rolling like a cow on a Ferris Wheel
(no I don't get that either).
I grinned #sharply, winked, could my magic work for me
now? Did anyone care? Are you reading!?
"Baby!" I said and walked forwards.


Becka M